Tuesday, October 19, 2004

 

Thoughts of Mortality

My mother died in May this year. Tomorrow would have been her birthday - will be going down to put some flowers on the marker in Basingstoke Cemetary.She did not go easily - she fought the cancer to the end - but its not the morbid thoughts of mortality that make me smile and think of her. It started to go wrong right from the start - She decided to be cremated - So when my sister tried to book the Crem she was told that "Basingstoke Crem" has burnt down !! and only taking a very few services a week so it would have to be Aldershot on Wednesday or wait for over a month. She who must be obeyed and I were down in Portsmouth in our caravan. So we started up to Aldershot early in the morning and in keeping with the theme we broke down badly (unfixeable) on the Exeter bypass and due to the vagaries of the "fourth emergency service" managed to miss my own mother's funeral !! After the enevitable backlash from the family we managed to sort out the time/date for her interrment - Another problem we forgot that Basingstoke District Council require £382.00 for a square foot of earth and a 12 x 12 granite marker with small column and angel £1865.00 . I could feel the cold wind on the back of my neck - Mother was always the life and soul of the party - you know the embarrassing jolly lady with the big laugh and the bright red "granny knickers" waving in the air - she loved life and drink and food and people. So there we were at the appointed hour waiting at Basingstoke Cemetary under a state of armed truce - a lot of the relatives still had not (and probably never will forgive me for missing the funeral) Up draws the undertaker's car. He jumps out, goes round to the back and just within my hearing as I approached to take the box said "Oh f*****k, I've left her behind !!"At this point I most definitely heard the spectral laughter and I knew she was getting me back for missing her funeral by being late for her own interrment ! My sister (who had just about forgiven me) took one look at me and could not believe I was laughing - I explained and god bless her she realised what was going on and we both knew then that mum had forgiven me - It took the stupid git over an hour to get mum's box and get the thing underway but it felt 100% better than the dreadfull days of guilt I suffered after missing her funeral - Im glad I've got that off my chest so I can now go tomorrow and put flowers on her marker with a smile and remember her for the wicked, laughing, drinking, little old man chasing person she wasfeeling bettermog
# posted by Mystic mog

Comments:
Glad your Mom had a sense of humor that, apparently, the rest of the family had put aside. I'm sure you felt awful about missing her funeral, but it wasn't purposeful, so don't torment yourself.
 
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